At this time of the year, being the author of a book on goals with a
reputation as an ''expert'' on the subject has its downside. At some time
during a festive season event somebody invariably comes up to me and wants
to argue the point. "I don't need to set goals", or "I don't believe in
goals", or "I prefer to have intentions or make choices". Goals, it seems,
has become a dirty word for some people.
I listen but don't usually try to convince them otherwise. After all,
I'm there to socialise, not go into verbal battle for a cause. But of
course I do have a point of view about goals and I'd like to share it
with you now.
Confront unachieved goals and discover new ones
In my experience, a lot of the resistance some people have to setting
goals, goal planning or even the word ''goal'' is based on fear. Fear of
being a failure; fear of the repercussions of not actually achieving the
goal; fear of taking responsibility for their choices; worry that setting
a goal may be restricting. A reluctance to use the ''G'' word can also be
because they have a hoard of unachieved or failed goals clogging up the
mental pipes.
Before I start to work with anybody on new goals I make sure we address
any fears and worries around goals that may be draining their energy and
holding them back.
I guide them through a process to reassess past failed goals so that
they are reborn to celebrate rather than regret these learning and strengthening
experiences. With confidence restored, we move on to discovering new goals.
Six important reasons to set your goals
But why have goals at all? Why not just trust and let life happen?
Why not hedge your bets rather than take the risk and make the commitment
of setting a goal? What is the advantage of setting firm goals?
- Goals help you direct your life rather than having life direct you.
If you don't have your own goals, chances are you are part of someone
else's.
- Goals give you the context to define what you want and measure your
achievements.
- Goal planning and achievement is as much about you as the goal. It
is an exciting, revealing, challenging and rewarding personal journey
to a new, happier and more powerful you.
- Setting goals and devising a plan helps you avoid straying down blind
alleys and making mistakes.
- Goals need not be set in stone. They can start as an intention or
an idea to be explored, and the exploration may reveal the true goal
or you may clearly discover that is not where you want to go or what
you want to have. You can then reassess and move on.
- Goals give you direction and focus for your journey through life,
but there is nothing to say you can't decide to take a different path
should a better one appear.
Think of a goal as simply being a marker at the end of the gap between
where you are now and where you want to be; what you have now and what
you want to have. And think of goal planning as getting clear on what
you need to do to get there by the simplest path.
Wendy Buckingham is a writer, speaker, coach and author of Ready Set Goal.
Her information website on coaching is dedicated to providing credible, independent resources on becoming a coach or adding life or business coaching to a skills portfolio.
To get to know Wendy better and to see what she offers, visit All About Becoming A Life Coach and her Facebook Page Becoming a Professional Coach for some great coaching and goal setting tips.
